Letting Go… Changes

Until recently, I often found myself wishing the girls were older and more independent. I realize now that their childhoods, dependence and even the sleepless nights are fleeting and one day, they too, shall pass. As soon as I realized it, I wanted it at all back because looking at Eliza, I know now that once she is out of the baby stage, I won’t have a baby at home but rather two little girls. A sudden pang of sadness overcame me recently because I realized that I will never have to change another diaper for Sophia or that in a matter of weeks if not days, I will cuddle next to her for her very last nap. The sadness is because sometimes, we don’t even realize when we do something for the last time.

These changes ride along with what has been incredibly busy months of August and September. I promised to share some big things we’re working on and this post is as fitting as any to do so. We have moved from the D.C. suburbs to Philadelphia. I have transferred to our New Jersey office and our house is going on the market in a matter of days. Not only did we move, but we did so immediately following Evan’s sister’s wedding; When the kids and I left to attend the wedding, we left our Maryland home for the very last time.

A move is almost always a huge deal, but it is incredibly stressful when doing it with a toddler and an infant. Not only are we switching houses, we are switching nannies. Our nanny in Maryland is loved not just by the children but by our entire family. Our goodbye on Sunday was tearful even though it wasn’t a goodbye so much as a farewell because Ingrid will always be in our lives and our children’s lives. She even came and helped with the children at the wedding which was such a relief.

And so we had to add a nanny search to our list of tasks as part of the move and that is a huge headache and responsibility. We are officially living in our beloved city of Philadelphia, temporarily maintaing two households, and hopefully looking forward to settling into a permanent residence in a few months once and if our house sells.

To say that the last few months have been stressful is an understatement but I think we handled the move gracefully and admittedly not without help from our family. Changes, for me, are always difficult but there I get no greater pleasure than knowing that I succeeded in achieving a goal I set for myself. I can’t wait to start this new chapter in our lives and see where it leads.