This was the second year that we haven’t seen [significant] snow. I don’t know how I feel about that. On the one hand, we avoided major debacles that is the D.C. region’s commute during even the slightest precipitation. On the other hand, Sophia doesn’t really know what it is like to get on a sled and roll down a hill to your heart’s content. Personally, I prefer that when it snows, it really snows. None of this 1-2″ business. Who cares about 1or 2 inches? That is more of an inconvenience than snow. You see, this region doesn’t really know how to deal with weather. We only like it hot, wet and sticky during the summer — the forecast de rigueur.
Imagine my surprise when driving to work one day — okay, crawling to work one day — I heard that we were getting a winter storm in March. Turns out, it is no kidding a winter storm complete with snow, freezing rain, sleet and winds. If only I was of school age and could have a “snow” day. Nonetheless, when life gives us lemons, we’ll make lemon ice so to speak.
The next installment of the story of how I came to be who/where I am … if you’re new here, the previous ones are here, here, and here.
My dad, a Colonel by this point had made a decision to retire so that he and my mom could emigrate to the United States. The decision, I am told, was difficult. My parents had everything going for them; Being a retired, esteemed and decorated member of the armed forces, my dad was entitled to a cushy pension, a private apartment of substantial size in the city of his birth (Kiev) and many other perks (e.g., in the former USSR, Colonels did not have to wait in line at train stations or airports).
My sister and I however, had extremely limited prospects. Education was free (in fact, they paid YOU to go to college — if you were accepted to a program that is) excellent, required and respected. Nonetheless, education was not guaranteed even if your grades were outstanding and your entrance exams passed with flying colors. Corruption and wide-spread racism (your religious affiliation was forcefully stamped in your passport) were major causes for concern and barriers to attaining a spot at a respectable university. Employment opportunities were becoming scarce and even though it was the nineties, my parents were all but certain that neither my sister nor I will enjoy the same quality of life as did my parents. They made the ultimate sacrifice to emigrate.
Sophia has started to show interest in looking at picture albums. I find it entertaining to watch as she jovially quips “Baaaa-a–by” every time she lays eyes on a picture of hubby or me during our toddler years. We’ve thus started to look through our albums and even watched our wedding video for the first time in a few years.
I can’t say that I didn’t feel sadness seeing myself and hubby on our wedding day — we looked much younger. Perhaps we all look younger when we’re happy or perhaps having kids can age you. What it must really be is that having kids who don’t sleep the night has a way of aging you super fast. My fleeting moment of sadness may have something to do with the fact that I was 25 then and I will be 30 in a little over a month’s time. I am sure my readers have little sympathy for me about about turning 30, but I … I digress.
Watching the video was a lot of fun. Sophia attempted to dance to the music and I listened to the wedding speeches from our family and friends. I didn’t just listen to them — I heard them. My father-in-law’s speech had an especially poignant message that has finally hit home.
He said that our wedding was nothing like that of his parents who were Holocaust refugees at the time of their nuptials. The real beauty of the day is the love that we share that was so well reflected by the family and friends in the room. His advice was simple: it is easy to love one another on your wedding day but there will be times when it won’t be easy but the best thing to do is to “just keep loving each other… love is great, love is grand, love will carry you to many lands.”
He was right. It does get difficult to make each other a priority and we do forget that we are not just Mama and Papa. When it does get hard, like the last few weeks, I think back to how I felt that day and remember those words. The eternal optimist in me is back, especially, after a date-night. Our love is great, it is grand, carried us right to the District [of Columbia] and back :-).
The first date-night we had been on in the nation’s capital in close to two years — certainly the first since Sophia’s birth. A little bit of a backstory — Sophia’s acid reflux came back with a vengeance as did her teething. She had vomited spectacularly all over her room, her bath, me, the walls almost every night for the past week. Topping off the vomiting and the behemoth cleanup was her sleep or more specifically, lack thereof. She started waking up every hour or hour and a half and as I said previously, only mommy can console her during the night.
We were tired and overwhelmed and glad to see my parents. They brought with them not only delicious food but also a sense of calm and reassurance. Once here, they were quick to get us out the door to try and unwind. It had been far too long since we were out on a date. We didn’t even know what to do with ourselves; Dinner? Movie? There is that interesting photography exhibit at one of the Smithsonian Museums, the theater, the movies or general strolling. We decided to go to the movies since the Oscars were on last week and some of the nominated pictures looked promising. Movie and a dinner was the plan.
The movie we saw was Argo and I thought it was very good. The movie theater was of course one of the Landmark theaters. They have those in Philadelphia and we love them because they show a lot of smaller, independent films and are always clean and well-cared for. We had never been to this one (located on E street in D.C.) before but knew we wouldn’t be disappointed.
I realized quite quickly that I hadn’t been out on a date-night as soon as we made up the escalator from parking. First of all, thank goodness our babysitters were free because movie tickets were astronomical (23$/tickets). Since it is a while before I can be called a senior, I am considering going back to school just so I can get the student discount :-). Once I got over the shock of spending nearly 25 dollars on movie tickets and eleven to park, I realized it was still very much worth it.
The movie theater turned out to be first rate, clean, well-cared for with great patrons who seemed to be looking for the very same experience we had. No loud kids, no sticky floors, or seats. To top it off — this is a big girl/boy movie theater. They sell alcoholic beverages at the concession stand. I must admit, I was rather taken back and although we opted for a water and an Italian soda, I appreciate having the choice. Lovely… and a great movie that really entertained.
Thoroughly thrilled by Argo, we decided to get a few small plates from a great Izakaya (japanese bar) and were happy to have ended up at Kushi. I rushed home because I wanted to see Sophia before she went to bed and was overjoyed to find my daughter happy and enjoying her time playing with her Baba and Deda.
It was a great evening because sometimes even the most devoted parents who love their children very much need to recharge their batteries. I always say how much I love Philadelphia, but as we were driving along the Potomac river, D.C. looked magical and I am sure I will love it here too.
As has been a tradition for the last few weekends, this post once again documents our precious time off. Our weekends seem to fly by faster than all the other days of the week even though we try to take it easy. This weekend was extraordinary; we got a chance to get out for some hubby and me time and we got to catch up on less thrilling things like taxes, laundry and shopping.
My parents came down to visit with us and spend some time with their granddaughter. They brought dinner — many nights worth of dinner, in fact and I provided dessert.
{this moment} – A Friday ritual. A single photo – no words – capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.
We’re feeling quite art-sy these days … Here is the latest masterpiece.
Interested in learning more about children’s cognitive development when it comes to drawing, I did some research and came upon this. Looks like we’re in the scribbling stage.
The fact is that even people who are trained teachers and psychologists are challenged on a daily basis in their attempts to parent their children. In fact, I don’t believe that any amount of education in any field can adequately prepare you for the task of bringing up the next generation.
“The amount of time you will spend with your child is constant. You will spend it either when they are little by playing, learning and teaching or you will spend it later in a therapist’s office listening how your child really feels.” These words are perhaps the most salient advice I’ve received about parenting. They are the advice of my husband’s graduate advisor who besides being an incredible applied mathematician, is very wise.
Simple, right? Spend more time getting to know your child now and there will be fewer unanswered questions and surprises down the road. And isn’t this what we are doing — getting to know our children? A child’s personality is pretty much set at birth and unlikely to change. Our job, albeit terrifying at times, is to shape them as people and teach them how to cope with various situations in life.
Every weekday as the clock ticks 4 PM, I will myself away from my computer and begin my second shift of the day as a Mama. I remind myself that albeit it is the afternoon shift, it is the most important one of the day, of my life.
One can classify my early childhood as idyllic. Being ten years younger than my sister, I am the baby of the family. I enjoyed my sister’s [almost] undivided attention; She taught me how to read, played with me and was and still is the person I admire the most and absolutely adore.
Baku was a lovely place to be a kid. The city is unique, a perfect melding of European and Islam architecture.
The people are warm and generous showcasing Middle Eastern sensibilities and the food, oh, the food so delicious. The markets were always brimming with unique, exotic, always ripe fruits and vegetables. Some of my very favorite dishes are really Azeri. The locals are masters in utilizing herbs, greens, lettuces and eggplants, peppers into their cooking.
The remainder of my childhood was less idyllic and can be characterized best by uncertainty: 1. we were refugees in a war, 2. my dad retired, and 3. my family moved to the United States.
I don’t remember everything from my time as a refugee in Kiev, but I do remember realizing how much I missed my dad once we came back in the Spring of 1990. He stayed back as a member of the armed forces assisting in establishing order in the city that was ravaged by war. I don’t know of a single family that wasn’t impacted by that conflict. Baku was never the same after we returned in 1990 and we never felt safe. I heard gunshots nightly from then until 1991 when we left. Even now, when I watch the news and I see conflict and human suffering, I have a very real understanding of what that is.
Much like my secret single behaviors (SSBs), hubby and I have our own traditions. One that stands out is our fervent reverence of the coffee bean. In fact, we love it so much so, that we felt compelled to include it in our vows and the text of our ketubah. So the tradition is that we like to enjoy a freshly brewed cup of coffee together on the weekends. It is now-a-days a less tranquil experience, but one that we hold on to.
We like to enjoy the coffee out of our Moi and Toi (me and you when translated from French) cups. I got these years ago right after we moved in together. They’re Limoges cups and although simple in design, their excellent quality, thin and refined porcelain enhance our weekend cups of coffee much like a proper wine glass enhances the grape elixir which it holds.
… and the fact that I got them on clearance nearly 6 years ago at TJMaxx of all places just makes me realize that we can find the most special things when we least expect them to.
